FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
COLLINGWOOD, ONTARIO – December 7, 2023
Blue Mountain Ski Resort is thrilled to announce the grand opening of the winter season, bringing you the perfect blend of excitement, questionable decision-making, and a distinct lack of snow! The slopes are open, the bars are flowing, and yes, you read that right—our legal marijuana shop is ready to elevate your mountain experience with our patented The Chill Zone experience!
Snow Conditions Report
Our expert snowmakers have been working around the clock to transform Blue Mountain into a winter wonderland. In the spirit of creativity, we’ve managed to scrape together a 4-foot-wide section of snow, cunningly positioned to form what some may generously call a “run.” Forget about pristine powder; we’re pioneering the art of snowy minimalism!
WARNING
Please be advised: while the hill is technically open, we strongly discourage anyone with an ounce of self-preservation from actually attempting to ski or snowboard until the conditions improve. We suggest admiring the 4-foot wide snowy masterpiece from a safe distance, perhaps while enjoying an affordable $10 beer or some completely legal marijuana cigarettes from The Chill Zone.
Après-Ski Extravaganza
Fear not, thrill-seekers and chill-seekers alike! Our lively bars are ready to keep the spirits high, even if the snow is not. Warm up with our signature Blue Mountain Breeze on tap or unleash your inner winter warrior with a blazing hot toddy or two. And for those seeking a different kind of high, swing by our legal weed cafe, where the only thing higher than the altitude is your newfound appreciation for the beauty of a snowless slope.
Join the Blizzard, or Just the Party
Blue Mountain Ski Resort is open for business, and the choice is yours – whether you’re seeking the thrill of the hill or the chill of The Chill Zone. Come for the festivities, stay for the vibes, and let’s kick off this winter season with a blend of excitement and a touch of the unexpected.
About Blue Mountain Ski Resort:
Nestled in the heart of Collingwood, Ontario, Blue Mountain Ski Resort offers a blend of winter adventures, culinary delights, and now, a unique Chill Zone experience. With a commitment to providing unforgettable moments, Blue Mountain invites guests to embrace the possibly snowy conditions of the season.
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